I just spent the last hour and a half doing an utterly mindless, brain-numbing, tedious computer task for my dad. Towards the end, I felt like either crying or puking I was so bored.
Have pity on me.
I need a hug...

Brian: I may have to sneak into your house to kick you then.

Saw him. : D

Me: When his hair's not spiked, he looks...fuzzy.
Caitlin: Yeah, he does...
Me: Like a giant teddy bear...except perverted.
Caitlin: Eww...

Brian, you didn't kick me today. So there. Ha. : P

Key Club tonight. Yay!
I brought my camera so I could use up the film. Got some hilarious pictures.

Matt: What are these for?
Me: I'm just using up film.
Matt: Oooh, here, I'll pose for one. *strikes pose*
Me: *takes picture*
Brian: *runs in and dives in front of the camera at Matt. Thankfully after I took the picture*

Matt: I'm running the meeting tonight.
Me: Cool.
Matt: I'm scared...
Me: It's okay, Matt.
Matt: Don't make fun of me when I'm talking. Don't look at me.
Me: *takes a random picture of Matt*
Matt: Yeah, see, that's mean.

Me: We should shout "go Matt" when he starts talking.
Shreya: We should shout "go Dora".

Matt: You'll be passing out roses to mothers, people walking around, you know, it'll make them feel good about themselves. People like getting flowers.
Shreya: Yeah, especially Matt. But he never gets any.

Brian: I saw you guys wearing paper, so I just ran away.

Brian: I told my history teacher that I was going to the bathroom. That was like...half an hour ago.

Shreya: Brian, you're all stubbly.
Brian: You're stubbly too.
Shreya: *slaps Brian*

Matt: You just went against my culture.
Brian: What culture is that? Greekism?

Me: I have one picture left. I want to take a group picture.
Shreya: Dora! Get over here!

Me: Brian, you know you love hanging out with freshmen girls.
Brian: I would've sat with you guys, but...
Steph: You wanted to be with your own kind?

Good times. Karen threatened unspecific tortures if I show anyone those pictures of her and Steph wearing the paper dresses.

Good times.

I wish I could find those stupid bugs that bit me when I was playing with the branch clippers and handsaw last Sunday. I would yell at them.
Stupid bugs. Now I'm probably going to get some obscure, as-yet-unheard-of bug disease. Then I could have a disease named after me. Or the bug. Whichever comes first.
Curse them all. Infidelic pagan scum.

Tuna out.

I laugh in your general direction. Again.

Have a day.

Forgot to post this yesterday...

Brian: Do you guys know how I can get 12 hours?
Shreya: You can always try sleeping with Matt.
Brian: No, that didn't work last time.
Shreya: Well, he wasn't El Dictadora last time...or was he?

But why is all the rum gone?!

I saw him twice today. : D

Brian: I'm going to kick you every day until you say you're not moving.

More confirmation tonight...yay!
I don't remember much of what happened.
Josh apologized many times for missing the Habitat thing. Dave assumed that I still hate Josh for that and used the hideous "we".
First half of class...we talked about whether or not people who are anti-Israel are also anti-semetic.
And then later we watched a video about how Israel became a state. I remember absolutely nothing from that video...except Golda Meir disguised herself as an Arab woman in order to talk to the Arab ruler about the war...or something like that...
I gave Josh the Guster CD's. Hopefully the attempt to brainwash him to like Guster will go as well as the attempt to brainwash him to like Weezer went.

Tuna out.

I saw him today. : D

I think it's gotten to the point that I'm stalking him not so much because I'm still insanely in love with him *cough*, rather just that it's a whole buttload of fun. : D

But hey, let's not close any doors here. ;)

Jovial is now the best word in the world.

I laugh in your general direction.


*Brian hates Canada*
Me: Wait, but isn't Barenaked Ladies from Canada?
Brian: Uh, yeah, they are. But they don't play there.
Me: Right, that makes it okay.
Brian: But if they were playing in Canada I would throw rocks at them.
Me: Okay.
Brian: ...That's a really long way to throw.

Brian got mugged by Gypsies while traveling in Ukraine. I don't know about you, but I find this hilarious.

"Three words for you Sarah...Norwegian death metal." -Josh

Brian has been in the yookeez (Ukraine) for the last three weeks. He comes home tonight around 6. Sweet. Then he gets to suffer from jetlag because of the 16 (?) hour time difference. : D

Stupid sunburn.

I've just realized that the Klugers were also not at the building site...and Mrs. Kluger kinda organized the whole thing at our synagogue...and all 4 of them were supposedly going to come...

So now I'm just confused.

I helped *build* a house today. Habitat for Humanity. I didn't actually do any building, since this was one of the last days and all that was left to do was cleaning up and landscaping. I helped move a pile of dirt and then went to pick up trash in an empty lot across the street that was going to be a site for another house. I found some pretty interesting stuff...like, you wouldn't normally find when picking up trash.
-A completely intact danish. No bites taken out of it or ants swarming all over it.
-A barbie radio
-A metal fork
-A "101 Dalmations" book
-A gas bill
Joel found a blanket and several liquor bottles. Dave and I found some of those too.
Dave also found a giant spider. We didn't throw that away though.
Yay for landscaping...we were making the garden in front of the house that was dedicated today look all pretty. I did one half. Dave did the other. Guess which one came out better? (Dave sucks at gardening. Sorry Dave...unanimous verdict of all who was asked. Yourself included.)
And then...Dave and Joel and I cleared out the yard in front of the house next door that already existed and was going to get a makeover. I got to play with branch clippers and a handsaw. Dave was afraid that I was going to cut his fingers off. Joel laughed at him for giving me ideas. A branch stabbed me in the nose when I went to heave a bag of dead leaves and sticks into the dumpster. Stupid branch.

"Hahaha! It's a pink thing!"
"Eww...it's oozing."

"Look! A worm! Hey, you killed it!"
"No, I threw dirt on it."
"Yeah, you killed it."
"No...worms live in the dirt, stupid. I saved it from burning alive in the sun."
"What proof do you have that worms burn alive in the sun? It's not like you see dead worms on the sidewalk or anything."
"I'm not going to dignify that with a response."

"Hey, I helped build that house. I did part of the garden."
"Yeah, you did a really crappy job on it though."

"Dad, have you fixed the electric thing yet?"
"No. We're very close to finding out what's wrong though. Or jumping out the window."
"Or killing each other."

Josh should have been there too. He promised he would come. And, when Dave went to his house to give him a ride over, guess what? He was still asleep. So now I'm really pissed at him. No jokes, hon.
If it had been me, I wouldn't have just walked away like Dave did though...I would've gone up to your room and woken you up with a bucket of cold water. And then walked away.
No jokes.

I've seen pictures that my parents took of those two high schools in Arizona. Very nice. A hell of a lot better than the high school I'm going to now...
One of them has a "Plaza Cafe" and both of them have outdoor cafeterias (it doesn't snow in Arizona!) and courtyards that you go through to get to your classes, 'cause each high school has a bunch of different buildings that you have classes in. And one of them has a "theatre". Very nice...
My only complaint is the signs in front of the schools...they're the kind of signs that you move the letters around to say whatever...like, "Welcome to McDonalds. Food is 50% off because it all sucks. Next week: Food is 75% off". Not that a sign would ever be honest enough to say that, but just to get the image in your mind. For some reason, that kind of sign in front of a school has always bugged me.

Because I am not mean like Shreya and Karen...*coughcough*...I am going to give whoever is interested the link for End of the World:

http://www.ebaumsworld.com/endoftheworld.html

And...because I am so damn bored...I'm going to attempt to type fast enough to record it while listening to it. Here goes.

Hokay. So. Here is this earth. It's chillin'. Dang, that is a sweet earth you might say Wrong. Hokay, ruling out the ice caps melting....okay, I've already lost it. Starting over. I'll just type without punctuation now, so it'll go faster.

hokay so here is the earth its chillin dang that is a sweet earth you might say wrong alright ruling out the ice caps melting meteors becoming crashed into us...okay, forget this I can't type that fast.

We're definately going to blow ourselves up.

Mars is laughing at us, and some huge meteor's like "well fuck that."

wtf, ^^?

"Wtf, ^^?"

I've finally seen End of the World...so THERE, Shreya! I've SEEN it! And I didn't need YOU or KAREN to show it to me! I figured it out BY MYSELF, DAMNIT! So THERE!

Shreya: Sarah, I can't believe you haven't seen End of the World.
Me: I'm SORRY! Where is it? How can I see it?
Shreya: I can't tell you.
Me: Why?
Shreya: You don't deserve to know.
Me: Why?
Shreya: Because you haven't seen it.
Me: WHat? How can I see it if I don't know how to get to it? I don't even know what the hell it is!
Shreya: That's why you can't see it.
Me: Karen...can you tell me where it is?
Karen: Um...*glances at Shreya*...no.

So...this is just a big ol' friendly I HATE YOU BOTH. Because now I have seen it. And I found it myself. Without having to ask anyone. I have also seen "Schfifty Five". So there.

I am in love with Tyson Ritter.
(I'm sorry...please shoot me...)

Another thing that made me angry about Ella Enchanted...
They portrayed Lucinda as an evil bitch. She's not. She's just stupid. Stupitidy does not an evil bitch make. It's just annoying.

Just saw Ella Enchanted. Pretty funny movie, but their utter lack of Ability to Match Storyline of Book to Movie sickened me. Gail Levine must be dying of pissed-off-ness, they completely destroyed her book.
Where the hell did the snake come from?
Since when did Char's uncle kill Char's father and then plot to kill Char in order to steal the throne?
Since when was Ella the stereotypical Damsel in Distress? She saved herself from the ogres, damnit. Didn't wait until Char came riding up on his white horse to rescue her.
And if I hadn't already read the book...the way that Char and Ella fall in love would've really pissed me off. According to the movie, Ella thinks Char is a pretentious asshole, she hates him and everything he stands for, and then falls in love as soon as she meets him. Ooooh, that part after Char *rescues* Ella from the ogres? And Ella's like "oh, you're bleeding". And Char's like "oh, it's just a scratch." And Ella's like "you better let me take care of that for you." Cut to...Char sitting shirtless on the bank of a stream, Ella leaning close to him...*wtf, man? what is this?* And then later, at the giant's wedding, and the two of them are sitting in front of the giant fire, and Char's like "kiss me." And Ella goes to kiss him, and Char's like "that wasn't an order" *wtf, man? he doesn't know about the curse.* And Ella's like "I know." *wtf, man? it doesn't happen like that, damnit!*

Hollywood Asshole #1: Hey, I like this idea of a kid having a curse so she has to do whatever anyone tells her.
Hollywood Asshole #2: Yeah. But the rest of the story sucks. Let's change everything around.
Hollywood Asshole #1: Yeah, we can make minor characters more important and major characters practically nonexistant.
Hollywood Asshole #2: And change the whole love thing too. That chance meeting and friendship gradually turning to love thing just doesn't work for me. Let's have the girl-hates-boy boy-rescues-girl girl-falls-in-love-with-boy thing instead.
Hollywood Asshole #1: Hell yeah. Ya know what? Let's also create unnecessary sympathy for Char by having both his parents killed when he's a kid. Despite the fact that they're both alive and well, you know.
Hollywood Asshole #2: Good idea. We can also add in a talking snake that never existed just for laughs.
Hollywood Asshole #1: Hell yeah.

Stupid Hollywood. You ruin everything. You took one of my favorite childhood books and twisted it so horribly that I wouldn't recognize it if it weren't for the title. I hate you.

But the screaming fan club was amusing, as was the fact that Mandy trapped her boyfriend in a book. And Slannon was cute. : D For an elf, that is.

I went for a walk today. An evil ladybug landed on my arm. It was black and had two tiny red spots on its back. It scared me. I flicked it off, and probably killed it. Or at least stunned it. Poor poor evil ladybug.

Going to the movies tonight...seeing Ella Enchanted. Damn, I loved that book when I was little. Ah, memory lane...

All of you that I know can come visit me in Arizona. You can sleep in the shed with the donkey. Or in the house, if you'd rather.
Mom says that both high schools that I am eligible to attend are set up like college campuses. Sweet.

Spring. Very nice. A few weeks ago, I went out to my backyard, and laughed at the ice. I walked out onto the ice that was covering the grass, and jumped up and down on it. I kicked it. I ground holes into it. I watched its life slowly trickle away in a stream of water flowing down the driveway. And I laughed until my mom came over and asked what I was doing.

Mom: What are you doing?
Me: Laughing at the ice.
Mom: O...kay.
Me: It's melting.
Mom: I'm going to the post office now if you wanted to go to the library.
Me: Okay.

Die, winter. Die.

On an almost entirely different note, I am a bit depressed tonight. Because as of now, with how my parents' plans are going, by this time next year, I will be in Arizona. Damnit. At least there won't be ice.

Everywhere I go there's someone in a trenchcoat staring at me.
When I'm not at home I'm sure someone's rumaging through my trash.
Whatever could they want from me?
Is it just a part of a giant government conspiracy?
I gotta go see my doctor about this itchy pentagram shaped rash.

Yeah BnL.

I was unsuccessful in getting my mother to let me bid on the awesome kangol hat. Curses.

Quote of the Yestermonth:
Shreya: He's silly like a goose.

"Orlando the Axe was following the fox."

Rereading old Redwall books is fun sometimes.

I wish to bid on an awesome kangol hat on ebay. However, the seller has no rating and no shipping insurance, so this may not be the best of ideas. Damnit. It's so cool...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY KARINIA!!!!!

For real this time. Last time was a fake birthday. : D
Dude...you're fifteen...you're still older than me, damnit. Enjoy it. : D
Have a good one, Pippin.


On an entirely different note...my grandparents went home yesterday, so the random insanity now ends. *sigh*...

Poppa: No experimentations. Don't blow up the house.
Me: Can we have a few keggers?
Poppa: Sure, you can have tigers.
Me: Umm...

Rock climbing. Lovin' it.

Poppa: You guys are worn out already?
Random Guy who works at the rock gym: It's a vigorous sport.
Poppa: I'm not tired at all.
Random Guy who works at the rock gym: *Gives Poppa strange look*
Joe: He was talking about rock climbing, not sitting on a bench.

"...and then he left for the yookeez..."

Imitation Blog. Sort of like imitation crab. Except I don't think Imitation Blog tastes very good. Then again, neither does imitation crab...damn, I used to love that stuff though.

Poppa: You see, the reason you smell feet is that there are a lot of people here. And every single one of them has two feet. Some of them even have three feet.

The submarine also smelled like feet. But more so than the museum. Probably because there used to be 140 navy people living in that cramped space for god knows how long. Somewhere between 75 days and 6 months maybe.

Poppa: Imagine holding your breath for 75 days.

I just spent the last two and a half hours taping large sheets of white paper on the walls of my room. I started it day before yesterday, so there was only two walls left to cover. And then I taped up most of the pictures that I took down day before yesterday, so I could put up the paper. Redecorating is awesome. I got to listen to all of my new CD's while doing so. The best song out of all of these CD's is "A Lifetime", by Better Than Ezra. (Album: Closer)

Allie woke up 8AM
Graduation day
Got into a car and crashed along the way

We arrived late to the wake
Stole the urn while they looked away
And drove to the beach
'Cause I knew you'd want it that way

And you were standing on the hood of the car
Singing out loud when the sun came up.

And I know I wasn't right
But it felt so good
And your mother didn't mind
Like I thought she would
And that REM song was playing
In my mind
And three and a half minutes
Felt like a lifetime

It felt like a lifetime

And you move like water
I could drown in you
And I fell so deep once
Till you pulled me through

You would tell me
"No one is allowed to be so proud
They never reach out
When they're giving up."

And I know I wasn't right
But it felt so good
And your mother didn't mind
Like I thought she would
And that REM song was playing
In my mind
And three and a half minutes
Felt like a lifetime

Are you sitting in the lights?
Or combing your hair again
And talking in rhymes?
Are you sitting in the lights?

When I got home heard the phone
Your parents had arrived
And your dad set his jaw
Your mom just smiled and sighed
(And you move like water)

But they left soon
And I went to my room.
Played that disc that you'd given me
(And you move like water)
And I shut my eyes
Swear I could hear the sea

When we were standing on the hood of your car
Singing out loud when the sun came up

And I know I wasn't right
But it felt so good
And your mother didn't mind
Like I thought she would
And that REM song was playing
In my mind
And three and a half minutes
Three and a half minutes

Felt like a lifetime...

Awesome awesome song...the violin (or whatever string instrument that is) in it is sooo kickass.

Happy Birthday Karinia!!!

"Who's Karen?"
"I don't know who you are but happy birthday anyway"
"Who wrote that?"

We saw the video of our restaurant skits in russian class today...it's so great when Drew gets hit with the apple. He pauses for a second, and then just drops out of the camera. You know how most people, when they're falling on purpose, they make it obvious that its on purpose cause they like, put their arms out to catch themselves or whatever? Not Drew. Nope, he just collapses, regardless of personal safety. Which is what makes it so great.

This was my group's skit (translated):

Lauren: Hello. What would you like to order?
Rachel: *snobbishly* Hello. What are your specials?
Me: *also snobbishly* Do you have any good food?
Lauren: Yes, we have very good food. I would recommend shish kabobs or steak.
Me: I don't eat meat! I'm a vegetarian!
Craig: *runs in* I LOST MY CUCUMBERS!!! OH NO!!!
Rachel: I don't care, little boy. *to Lauren* I'll have piro-
Craig: I LOST MY CUCUMBERS!!!
Lauren: I'm not listening to you, Cucumber Boy.
Rachel: I'll have pirogis...(I forgot what she ordered)
Me: And I'll have cabbage soup, carp with mushrooms, tea with lemon, and pudding with berries. (in Russian restaurants, you order all your food at once)
Craig: And I'll have cucumber soup, cucumber sandwiches, cucumber juice, and cucumber pudding.
Lauren: I'll be right back.
Rachel: Go away, Cucumber Boy.
Craig: No! I want cucumbers!
Me: Fine. *takes cucumber out of purse* Have a cucumber.
Craig: Yay! And Cucumber Boy lived happily ever after.

Craig didn't memorize all of his lines, so he put the script inside one of the menus. It was kinda funny watching it on tape. All of us sitting around the table...Rachel and me scowling at Craig...Craig holding his menu frikkin sideways and staring at it as he recited his lines. Our teacher had noooo clue...*coughcough*
Yeah, ours was the most pathetic of the bunch.

From other skits (also translated)

*Danielle: *after trying to order several different kinds of food* What are your specials?
Sam: Stamps are 50% off.
Danielle: What?
Sam: This is a POST OFFICE!!! HO-HO-HO-HO!!! (With his trademark laugh that no one can duplicate or adequetely describe.)

*Joe 2: BOOM!
Joe 1: Soup's done!

*Jess: This is a horrible restaurant!
Joe 1: What's wrong?
Jess: The waiter is stupid and ugly!
Annette: We don't like ugly people!
Joe 1: There's nothing I can do about that.
Jess: *pause*
Joe 1: *points to fork*
Jess: *pause*
Joe 1: *taps fork*
Jess: *picks up fork* *shoves it in Joe 1's face* *pause*
Joe 1: *laughs* (these last 6 lines were Jess forgetting her next line)
Jess: This fork is dirty!
Joe 1: *licks fork* There, it's clean!

Stalking is fun. Otherwise I'd never see him. :D

Mr. Landers: Good morning, Pirate! *walks into SS workroom*
Random kid in my homeroom: Did...did he just say "good morning pirate"?
Me: He was talking to me.
Random kid in my homeroom: Ah. Okay.

Joe gave Drew CPR in Russian today. He had collapsed after Ali threw an apple at him, you see. The apple that Drew had dropped on the ground when Sasha tripped him and then gave to Mimi. That Mimi bit and spat out and dropped on the table in front of Ali. And then Ali threw the apple at Drew. It hit him in the stomach. And he collapsed on the ground. And Joe gave him CPR. And Sasha and Mimi and Ali all left the restaurant. Good times.
This was a skit they were doing.
And somehow, Drew survived Joe pounding on his chest. He said later that he should have screamed in agony before he collapsed. Kids in drama class are so funny.
Needless to say...it made me smile.

I saw him today. But only once. And he didn't see me. *Waah...* Good ol' obsession.

More confirmation tonight. Yay!

Mr Rader: So what do you guys want to talk about?
Dave: Homosexuality. Like, Judaism's view on it and stuff.

Poor Dave...everyone took that the wrong way...

It takes five people to figure out how to answer a factoring problem in Josh's textbook. And then they all still fail. Miserably.

But then we got to watch more History of the World. Good times. Josh sung the Inquisition song. It worried me.

"Send in the nuns!"

I saw him today. Twice. *obsession rocks*

And by the way, tell Sarah I've worn her bracelet quite a bit, though it's hard to explain after the conversation goes to "Oh, she made you a bracelet? Are you going out?" "No...with her friend though" "So why did this Sarah girl make you a bracelet and not Shreya?" "Err...I don't know, I'm a likeable guy."

-From one of Brian's emails to Shreya...

It makes me smile.

"A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle."

Confirmation tonight. Good times. We talked about how Judaism will end with our generation unless we do something about it. And something about how tradition is changing because it has been acknowledged at our synagogue that G-d can be male or female, we do not know.

"They neutered G-d!" -Josh or Dave. (Don't remember who.)

And then we got to watch History or the World, Part I !!!

"He missed! He missed!"
"I'm going to take a treasure bath!!!"
"And then all the way up to the emperor...ah, shit!"
"Wash this." *after pulling life duck out of butt*
"No, no, no, yes, no, no, yes, no, no, no, no, no, yes!, no, no, no, no, n-....YES!"

Happy Passover to all those Jewish folks out there. And it is official...Mindy and Craig are both bad bad Jews. They're both going to the hell that we don't believe in.

I made a new discovery last night. The thing about Jewish wine (Manichevitz [sp?]) is that it's so sweet, you tend to forget it's alcohalic until you start falling asleep before the main course starts. Not that I would know this from personal experience...
But anyways, I've now given up wine. (Meaning Manichevitz [sp?]. Other wine is nasty.) At least until I'm legal.

Me: Wait, so what's this website?
Mike: You see...I have this thing for taking pictures of myself in the nude...

Anyhoo.
Went to see Hellboy today with Josh and Dave.
Biggest waste of my money since I saw Spy Kids 3D.
Except Hellboy was worse.
No plot whatsoever, and 3 of the main characters could have been easily removed without changing the nonexistant story line too much.
But it was all worth it to listen to Josh ranting and screaming about it on the car ride home.
Pity I don't remember most of what he said. The only thing I remember was when he was ranting about how when they walk into the room full of demons, they shouldn't have just been like "Oh, let's be all quiet and back away slowly." They should've screamed. Like,
"OH MY F***ING CHRIST! IT'S A THING! WITH TEETH!"
Just like that.

Josh figured out how one changes the font on blogger. I LOVE YOU!!! Verdana just doesn't do it for me. Garamond all the way.

I finally stopped being lazy and went to blogger and got myself a REAL blog, so I'm taking down the Imitation Blog on my site asap. As soon as I can get on my dad's computer. (Good thing about this blog...I can update it from the computer I can get on regularly...)

I'm going to actually tell you stuff as soon as I figure out how to work this thing.