Hebrew school...the 5th graders aren't nearly as much of a gang of brats as the 6th graders are. That's why I don't mind being an aid on Sundays. I was in charge of the Poster Brigade today, advertising for the Mitzvah Mall in two weeks. All of ya'll have to go to that. (That means YOU.) Sunday, May 16, 10:30 to 12:30, synagogue social hall. Donate to one or more of 13 different charities that the 5th graders have chosen to support.

I think I have lime disease. (or some other bug-related thing) So mommy is calling the doctor so I can get out of school tomorrow. (Hopefully. May be after school.) Josh already has dibs on all my stuff if I die. (He's the only one who has thought of that possibility. That's Josh for ya.)

Me: I think I have lime disease.
Josh: Oooh, can I have all your crap if you die?
Me: You want all my crap?
Josh: Let me rephrase that...I want all your stuff. Especially those shoes so I can burn them.
Me: You're not getting my All Stars. That 5th grader Ryan's getting them.
Josh: I want all your pink clothes then.